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Fly away, Sweet Kayla

This is Kayla.


I met Kayla when she came to our ice cream truck as a customer. Kayla was cool. A while later I was playing with The Boston Pops. Amanda Palmer was the guest soloist, and Kayla was working the merchandise counter. Kayla was cool.

When we were starting to open our first shop, we needed counter staff and had no idea how to hire people. Where the hell do you find a crew? We didn't have the foggiest. I thought of Kayla, cuz Kayla was obviously into doing whatever and quite frankly, she seemed cool.

Kayla knew as little about working in an ice cream shop as we did about running an ice cream shop. Fake it til ya make it. Kayla has been making that shop go ever since.

Tuesday 8/5 is Kayla's last day with us. She is going to climb onto a unicorn, ride it across a rainbow and through cotton candy clouds and take up residence in a magical world of music and art.

When I learned that Kayla was leaving us I started crying, and since then I haven't stopped for long. Kayla is one of us. She has given so much to Bryan and I... I could never put into words how grateful we are. Kayla has made the East Village shop into what it is and will always be.

Thank you, Kayla. Fly away. Follow Pecker II and Pecker I to a magical nest full of dreams about space kittens.


Show us your talent! Eww, not that! Put that away

Pageant The Musical - the most sensational drag pageant to ever grace off-Broadway - is returning to New York, and we're teaming up with them to host our own little talent competition! The prize? Tickets to Pageant The Musical, duh. We want you to upload a video to Instagram and show us your best baton twirling, water glass playing, clogging, or whatever! Here are the details:

We'll be accepting entries from today until Saturday, July 12.

Three winners will be announced on Monday, July 14.

Each winner gets a pair of tickets to Pageant.

Upload your video "audition" to Instagram. Sorry, you must post to Instagram. 

All entries must tag @biggayicecream and @pageantthemusical AND use the hashtag #biggaypageant.

In "Pageant the Musical" the audience gets to pick the winners. But in this talent competition, we have Broadway bloggers Patty & Emily on hand to do the judging. They will choose the winners at their discretion with no qualifications or reasoning other than they think the applicants are particularly amazing. So, show us what you've got, and don't forget to be a lady!

Note: I saw "Pageant" back in 1992 with my sister Janet. Maybe it was the champagne, but we had an amazing time and I'm so glad that the production has resurfaced. 



Bryan is a judge at TACOLANDIA, part of the Los Angeles Vendy Awards. This Saturday!


a brief word from Dave Hill

This post was written by Dave Hill. It does not reflect the beliefs or views of Big Gay Ice Cream. The owners of Big Gay Ice Cream think that most of this post is totally wrong and off-putting, and we don't even like Dave Hill.



This past Sunday, which was the day before Memorial Day, which means no school or work or any of that bullshit, I went with my friends Doug, Jodi, Kathy, Elijah, Donny, Patty, and Stephanie on a trip to Ronnybrook Dairy Farm, which is the the farm where Big Gay Ice Cream gets their cream and shit to make their ice cream, which is the best and you can ask anyone. What happened was Doug got a hold of some fucking van and asked us all to get in and everyone was just like “Fuck it”, so we did.

This is the crazy ass van that Doug got a hold of somehow. You could fit 15 crazy motherfuckers in this bitch if you wanted to. Fuck it.
Once we were all inside and the doors were locked by a switch only Doug could control, Doug told us we were going on a field trip to a dairy farm and I swear everyone’s eyes lit up like it was fucking Christmas or something. Seriously, we were so pumped because holy shit cows. It was like a two or three hour drive to the farm or something but no one even gave a shit because we knew when we got there we’d be hugging and rubbing up on cows and it was going to be fucking awesome. Also, Doug brought his dog Buster who is basically the funnest dog ever and if you can prove to me that you know a dog that’s more fun you can punch me in the fucking face. Buster rules and can probably even solve crimes, I bet. I don’t even know.

On the drive to the farm everyone was talking and laughing and listening to rock music and giving high fives and stuff and it was great. Along the way we passed a place that looking like they probably have a pretty solid wing night, but- as evidenced by the accompanying photo- that shit was cancelled and everyone was super bummed. Oh well. Fuck the world, I guess.

Wing nite is cancelled? Well maybe *you're* cancelled, asshole.

After pretty much the longest drive ever, we were finally at the farm and Doug set us all lose to live our dreams. Buster got it all started by rolling in a huge pile of fresh cow shit within about thirty seconds of being let out of the van and he was so psyched you would have sworn some asshole just told him they were gonna reverse the neutering process on him or something.

“Look at me- I’m covered in shit!” the look in Buster’s eyes seemed to say. Man that dog is awesome.

This is that sick fuck Buster covered in cow shit. He was so psyched!
After we got done hosing the literal shit off Buster, who definitely wasn’t psyched about not being covered in shit anymore, we took a tour of the dairy factory. There were no actual cows in the dairy factory, which was bullshit, but whatever. I thought it would be funny if the cows were in there working with hairnets on and stuff but that’s impossible. It’s too slippery. We did get to see how they (humans who work there) put milk in bottles, yogurt in other bottles, and then butter in some sort of container or another too and it was awesome. Also, Ronny and the other Ronnybrook Farms people basically gave us all the chocolate milk we could drink and it was the greatest thing that has ever happened. And when I had to go to the bathroom later, I even got to pee in the employee restroom which was awesome because hey look who’s peeing in a real dairy factory, everybody! No one has ever done that and everyone was so psyched.

Once we got done with the touring the dairy factory, we had a big barbeque outside with Ronny and the rest of those crazy motherfuckers from Ronnybrook farm. It was so awesome. There was chicken and hot dogs and we were eating the fuck out of that shit. At one point, fucking Buster ate a hot dog that was just sitting there for no reason. Seriously he is the best and does cool shit like that all the time. It’s nuts.

After the barbeque, it was time to go check out some fucking cows. First, we went in some crazy ass barn that had like sixty cows in it or some shit and we just hung out with the cows like it was no big deal. The cows were just hanging out farting and shitting and pissing like they were being paid to do it or something. One second you’d be petting a cow and she’d be all into it, the next she’d be letting loose a piss so big you’d swear she’d been holding it in since the ‘80s. Also, I saw a cow’s vagina up close again for the first time since what happened last time. Awesome.

This is me being at one with the cows. The cows and I were super pumped except for the one on the end, who was really sort of a bitch.
Somewhere around this time, Stephin Merritt from The Magnetic Fields just showed up from out of nowhere with a big bag of apple cider donuts for everybody. Writing 69 Love Songs would have been enough of an achievement for anybody if you ask me, but the free donuts really pushed him over the edge in my book. That motherfucker comes correct.

After we got done eating the free donuts, it was time to go hang out with the baby cows, or calves as they are known in the trade. They were adorable and will pretty much lick anything which is nuts but whatever. We hung out with those crazy little fuckers for a while and then it was time to finish off the day with a fucking ice cream party where John from Ronnybrook farms just broke out like 40 gallons of ice cream and fresh berries and we dug into that shit like it was cocaine or something. It was so delicious and everyone loved it. Then we drove home. I don’t know if we are going back next weekend or not but I honestly would because it was the best and we fucking owned that place and you can ask anyone.

Dave Hill


Spend Valentine's Day With Padma